Maybe it is missing, that is why you consistently annoy people.
There are a lot of people in this world who feels that they should always say what is in their mind. They hold the principle of telling it like it is all the time. I find that to be admirable only if it is relayed in the “right” way. Most of the time, the outcome is disastrous. It comes out all wrong and gave the wrong message to the recipient even when the intention is good.
Firstly, seek first to understand then only to be understood. Don’t assume, don’t judge, and don’t jump to conclusions. Step into their shoes. Understand their explanation. Listen to what happen, their reasoning, their hardships, concerns and fears. We’re not born to read minds, we are born with the ability to ask questions and understand the answers. By understanding, you could easily get your message across. If you don’t seek to understand, anger-sarcasm-hatred-distrust fills the conversation. You will never get this person to be honest and open up to you ever.
Do you like to be ridiculed and given the indication that you cannot be trusted? Not a very good feeling. Then don’t do it to others. It hurts. If you have been through this, it is a fact that you cannot forget the words said to you especially if it is negative. Being ridiculed and not trusted leaves a very deep mark on a person. It is like a cut that do not want to ever heal.
Learn to use right sentences to get the message across. Use the right tone. Use a friendlier body language.
You may receive a positive feedback and change in the process. Try it.